What now?

What now?

I know not. For all the newfound wisdom, now that I truly remember the eons past... I don't know. I grieve for the loss of life, for the suffering, for the battles and yet I rejoice in their glorious tales whose wonder will never die. But now I stand alone, at the crossroads of eternity, waiting to fade away from the memories of my past.

And as I peer in to the veils of eternity, I see nothing. If only I had a star to guide me or a bird to show me a sign.

The end is past and the its time for new stories and a braver new world. For the moment, I think, I will rest. I'll lie still and silent. Strip my mind of thoughts. I shall close my eyes and breathe deep the slumber of eons.

Special

At some point in time, a person is blessed with meeting someone so special who touches life in a way that no one has before, in a way that is inexpressible, as it is a mutual linking of two hearts, friendship like no other, for you know it is something special right from the beginning, even if you have known the person for a very short time.

It is rare... and special!

Crashing Down!

Sometimes, despite our best efforts, we have no control over life. One moment, life is perfect and the next moment, suddenly you're crashing down. Trying your best to hold on to those beautiful memories. A part of me is dying today and I have no one to mourn with. I surrender myself to the pain, to the memories, to what all we represent and to the future.

These back steps are steeper to the ground
The brightest stars are falling down
I’m walking the edge, walking the tightest rope
We can be frank, reality rips on through, rolling like a hurricane
I’m over the bridge and under the rain

If everything’s falling, if everything’s changed
If I’m in the open, if I’m in the way
What am I doing here
If you’re not with me

What have I got to live for, if it’s just my own dream
Take it back to the beginning, back to the start
When gravity’s pulling, you’re still holding my heart
You come crashing down
Crashing down

These four walls are closing in on me
The talk is louder than I’ll sing
I want to be there, want to be where you are
but you know it all, Every look and smile that aren’t meant to break
I’m over the bridge and under the rain

If everything’s falling, if everything’s changed
If I’m in the open, if I’m in the way
What am I doing here
If you’re not with me

What have I got to live for, if it’s just my own dream
Take it back to the beginning, back to the start
When gravity’s pulling, you’re still holding my heart
You come crashing down
Crashing down

And you say that everything is different, why don’t we just hold on
And you say that everything is different, why don’t we just hold on
Crashing down

Negativity

There are these odd days when nothing seems to happen to you but a whole lot happens everywhere around you. It is intriguing that on closer introspection, what happens around you is somehow closely related to you. Why do what people say affect me? Actually they don't... not very much at least. I now see that people are saying only things that affect me. Odd right? The problem is in me. I'm making them say these things. Nope I am not telepathic now (I wish).

I have filled myself with so much negativity that I twist situations to suit that frame of mind. I feel sad when I see beggars on the streets and I wish I could do something. I have the same feeling of despair when I watch extremists impose their will on the weak and defenseless. I am most miserable when I see children begging for money to satisfy their hunger, not knowing that there is a life beyond ensuring that there is dinner. But what I don't see is that there are situations that are not as bad as I make them out to be. What I seem to forget is that I have in me the possibility of making things better.

My feelings influenced the mood in this case. Its time to let their feelings influence me. I give the beggars some food and their faces light up like the fireworks at New Year. Didn't that make a difference? In a small way... it did! Small incidents like this are helping me drive the negativity out. Its time for a little more balance. Its time for healing! Finally, after so long, I think there is a way out!